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September 30, 2010

Santa Barbara 2010 Voter’s Guide

Posted by Ryan McGivern under Politics, Santa Barbara, Social Justice
[12] Comments 

A November 2010 voter guide for Santa Barbara California.

Voting Day is Tuesday November 2nd…are you registered?

Governor:
How To Vote: Jerry Brown

Why: Jerry has a proven record of benefiting our State. As previous California Governor, mayor of Oakland, and California attorney general, he has the experience and connections with Californians that make him the best candidate. He has fostered job growth in the past and has a good environmental record. He is an advocate of clean energy jobs and understands the future of innovation and green economies. Jerry has a comprehensive energy plan that will support clean energy independence. He is also consistent in his stances on migration and is a stalwart advocate for Latino families in California. He is a fierce defender of privacy and personal liberties.

Lieutenant Governor:
How To Vote: Gavin Newsom.

Why: Gavin is the current chair of the California Commission of Economic Development and he knows how to keep California so attractive to innovative companies. Clean-tech and green jobs are areas where the economy is headed and Gavin is committed to nurturing these trends to best benefit California’s working families. His time as mayor of San Francisco established his reputation as a foreward thinking and tenacious representative of the people of California. He is also a great ally to LGBTQ communities and all of California’s families.

Secretary Of State
How To Vote: Debra Bowen

Why: As secretary of state, Debra earned the JFK Library and Museum Profile in Courage award by protecting voters and standing up to big corporations. Cracking down on voter fraud and opening the government to greater transparency are among her driving goals. A government that works for the people and is accountable to voters has been Debra’s project and we should support her in this goal.

Controller
How To Vote: John Chiang

Why: John stood up for California’s workers when Governor Schwartzenegger threatened to decrease state employees to 6.55 dollars/hour. John also is creative and proactive. In 2007, he helped struggling Californians by creating alerts that aided Californians recover seized assets.

Treasurer
How To Vote: Bill Lockyer

Why: Bill is on top of tort reform, incentives for and accountibility to high ecological protect of our state. He’s independent minded and let’s the law and the best interest of the state dictate his direction–not party.

Attorney General
How To Vote: Kamela D. Harris

Why: Kamela knows that the death penalty is immoral and ineffective. She crafted the Back On Track program that was signed in by Schwarzenegger. Kamela also brings a wise view of economics to recidivism to address larger forces to be addressed in reducing crime and bettering life in California. She opposed the anti-liberty Prop 8. She desires to hold parents accountable in student truancy, knowing that values learned at home matter.

Insurance Commissioner
How To Vote: Dave Jones
Why: Dave is supported by working people, liberty advocates, and conservative land-use groups far moreso than his opponent.

Member, State Board of Equalization, 1st District
How To Vote: Betty Yee, a Equalization board member currently is the most highly qualified candidate for this position.

U.S. Senator
How To Vote: Barbara Boxer

Why: Barbara supports Californian families. Barbara desires to uphold privacy laws and personal liberties. She had great success as a Representative and has spoken to power with tenacity and fearlessness. She worked with John Ensign on the Invest in the USA Act to ensure Americans’ hard work best benefit Americans first. She gets excellent ratings in her support of human rights, and she has worked to effectively reduce urban violence.

US Representative
How To Vote: Lois Capps

Why: Lois is a sensible and moderate representative who has a diverse and deep plan for issues that face our district most pressingly. She is attuned to facts on the ground and understands the dynamics of our state and our nation much better than the other candidates. She supports the military and families.

Member of the State Assembly
How To Vote: Das Williams
Why: An innovative and energetic stance to stimulate job growth for our district. Das is anything but status quo, and he is able to capture the vision and desires of the politically uninitiated. He has the experience and the intelligence to best serve our district.

Superintendent of Public Instruction
How To Vote: Tom Torlakson
Why: Tom has a more concise and thorough vision of how to better our schools and has much wider endorsements.

SBCC Governing Board Member Trustee Area #1
How To Vote: Sally Green
Why: Experience, balanced vision for SBCC

SBCC Governing Board Member Trustee Area #3
How To Vote: Desmond O’Neill and Joe Dobbs
Why: Most experienced candidates, broadbased support

SBCC Governing Board Member #4
How To Vote: Kathryn Alexander (Kay)
Why: Most experience, effective leadership, coalition minded

Proposition 19
How To Vote: Yes
Why: Compassionate and reasonable. A good proposition for the health of our State.

Proposition 20
How To Vote: Yes
Why: Congressional districts should not be chose by self interested politicians but by a balanced panel. Holds incumbents accountable. Vote ‘No’ on Prop 27.

Proposition 21
How To Vote: No
Why: Our parks need funding, true. But taxes should be allocated as needed each year. There are many needy programs in our state.

Proposition 22
How To Vote: No
Why: It is ill timed and creates unnecessary barriers to the detriment of our state.

Proposition 23
How To Vote: No
Why: It is a blatant attempt by BigOil to stagnate our state’s energy development. Its bad for business, its bad for our health.

Proposition 24
How To Vote: Yes
Why: It is supported by teachers, workers, civic services. Its opponents are exclusively big corporations. A yes on 24 is a yes to working Californians, not to CEOs.

Proposition 25
How To Vote: Yes
Why: It is supported again by workers, not corporations. Jerry Brown also gives it a thumb’s up.

Proposition 26
How To Vote: No
Why: It is a reverse of 25–supported by large corporations again. No on 26….Yes on 25

Proposition 27
How To Vote: No
Why: It is a reverse of Prop 20….Prop 20 good redistricting…Prop 27 bad redistricting.

Measure Q-2010 SB Secondary School District
How To Vote: Yes
Why: Our Central Coast youth deserve it, and is supported widely by educators.

Measure R-2010 SB Elementary School District
How To Vote: Yes
Why: See Measure Q

Measure S-2010
How To Vote: Yes
Why: City council support, SB Independent endorsement

Measure T-2010
How To Vote: No
Why: It is established on bad argumentation with little or no evidence. Meanspirited and is a big government move on small businesses.

Please comment below with any questions, comments, or suggestions.
We all care about Santa Barbara and while I have researched each major candidate and each side of arguments,
I may have missed something.

Santa Barbara County Voter Information:
http://www.smartvoter.org/ca/sba/

 

August 2, 2010

Lynmouth, England

Posted by Ryan McGivern under Places
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May 13, 2010

The Odyssey of Ulysses S. Groan (Part 21: All Roads and Times Lead To Topeka)

Posted by Ryan McGivern under Places, Travel, Ulysses S. Groan
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Chevy’s wheels unzipped the American highway opening the plains’ to their eyes like an octogenarian before a Geriatric Doctor. Mesa melted into chess board and wheat headed the way of corn to the lazy fallacio of oil rigs.
Lonely diners sat begrudgingly at diners that expected some sighs of respite despite their trite decor and rancorous tripe. With each unsavory Anti-Savoy that salted their palates, the Travelling Trio gained in artery blockage what they lost in will to live. 

Cannoned beetles and Polaroid overexposed flashes negated the land. Over-hot engines roared their dissapproval of what God had done with the place. A blasted existence of half myth and much too much religion, the American Middle Earth was the outie belly button of a porcine dead and bloated carcass: the most accessible sign of a great creature’s once held dignity and tragic beauty. Trailer trucks loaded with lethal appliances and drivers loaded with reds, vitamin C, and cocaine combated sleep and each other in a fight that assured busier lands and people their daily mounds of unneeded and unappreciated ‘needs’.

Two Kings, a Prince, and a Pooch on way to Atlantis City stepped from their hoop skirt shaped TARDIS and blinked at the unforgiving Sol Invictus. Menelaus hung the dress over a rusted and derelict gas pump as Argo made water on a Ford parked nearby. King of Ithaca and his only begotten son argued over the last stick of beef jerky.

Wayside hotels of highways littered the plains giving sup at the teets of road warriors and shelter to the lecherous from leering eyes. Mornings come early in these placard thin walled ant farms, with wake up calls coming in screaming wet sheeted children, boot galloping galoots, and the shrieks of tattooed shieks and their crystaled harems.

Coordinates collected and stars sextanted, Argo hailed the group back into the hoop skirt TARDIS The Lora. Ambling rambling back in, they blipped out of one particular existence. The web of universes is infinite and bubbling always with new and unnecessary permutations. Famously, in one universe, there is but a three volume set of The Complete Works of Thomas Mann floating in endless space. But all universes and their respective times have one hub, one place/time in common within their possibilities: Topeka Kansas.

All beings will at some time be incarnated within the city’s limits. To honor the TopekaHub, in the exact center of Jupiter there is an exact replica of the Cypress Ridge Golf Course made out of rubies and emeralds. Many thetans have played both golf courses and attest that the Fourth Hole is crazy difficult.

A few more blips about the American Plains, and the Trio’s Hoop Skirt appeared in front of the Helen Hocker Center for the Performing Arts and soon, with a number of aligning worm holes, the group was able to punch in Atlantis City in the NavCom.

O Topeka! Somehow it is true that you are a little bit of heaven. Even though heaven is infinite and any portion of infinity is also infinite. O Magic! O Wonder! O What Convenient Parking Ramps! What Quality City Sewage Services!

O Topekaaaaaa!
Gonna give you bunions, rickets and perturbations,
Pestle fer the mortars,
Syphilis and accusations!
Flowers on the prarie like the canker sores bloom,
Plenty of beer to help you cope,
Plenty of room to hide and elope!
Plenty of meth and plenty of dope.

O Topekaaaa!
Where the wind comes sweepin’ down the slacks
And the wavin’ sheets can smell like meat
When trapped wind is followed by the ‘rain’.
O Topekaaaaa!
Ev’ry night my honey hand and I
Sit alone and ‘talk’ while peeper toms stop to gawk
At me makin’ crazy circles on my thigh.

We know we belong to the land
And the land we belong to is grand!
And when we say
Yeeow! Ayipioeeay!
We’re only sayin’
You’re doin’ fine, Topeka!
Topeka, you’re less than great but better than O.K.

 

January 15, 2010

Duluth to Play Backdrop for Horror Comedy Film

Posted by Ryan McGivern under Art, Comedy, Places, Pop Culture
1 Comment 

Hollywood is coming home to Duluth!
Check out what the Duluth News Tribune wrote about the new movie being filmed there.
http://www.areavoices.com/fun/?blog=58702

Interested in being a part of a thrilling horror comedy that will bring Northern Minnesota the best time its had since last weekend ice fishing with Cousin Karl?
email:

sasquatchsbigllc@gmail.com

 

January 5, 2010

The Odyssey of Ulysses S. Groan: Part 11 (Ithaca. A Nice Place to Ransack, But I Wouldn’t Want To Pillage There.)

Posted by Ryan McGivern under Fiction, Improvised Writing, Places, Ulysses S. Groan
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Thus saith the Bard:
A short time ago in a sea  far, far, away there was an island named Ithaca. It was not so very different than any other place. There were the normal goings about that occur in any city where the inhabitants secretly hate each other yet rally around the shared greater hatred for foreigners. People could say that it was a shining city on a hill if it weren’t for the coal ash besoaked walls and low lying anthrax clouds.
The whistle from the factory each day heralded another venture to the bar which softened the hard blow of returning home and the church bells signalled the rush to the colosseum to find out what the score was in the big Bears vs. Martyrs game. Life there was as simple as life can be which is to say it was as wretched and demeaning as ever, but supplied with enough wine and denial to keep procreation an acceptable life choice. 
Days went by without a care in Ithaca, at least within the privileged class. Afternoons found many a goat-fattened bottom planted in a dais, perched upon a veranda watching the wretched of the earth below. They drank their mint juleps and nibbled cucumber sandwiches while deciding which human emotion to seal off from their perview. Theirs was the life of luxury and they were envied by none.
In the shadow of their haciendas were the ever hunched and squatting masses, set about in their toilings and common violences which were the inspiration for religious saints and the subject of newspapers’ neglect. The poor of Ithaca were as the poor of anytime or place to theologians: But a dream appealed to feigning piety and a nightmare revealed by prophets to their shame. To the politician before the election they were the banner and after the election the toilet paper. To the middle class, they were their unadmitted equals, to the upper class their moral superiors.
Ithaca was a quiet place, a tranquil haven for respite and reflection during the breaks between army-conscription raids and parades honoring the glorious dead and unfortunate injured. All was well on the heavenly isle, the site of many epic poem and love ballad. 
Of Ithaca it was said,
“There is a mountain there, which a public works project aimed to craft into a volcano  
high Neriton, covered in forests. Its discharge rather than lava was to be the city’s effluvium
for its citizens nary minded being shat on so long as it was in grand style.
Many islands lie around it, very close to each other,
Doulichion, Same, and wooded Zacynthos–all a bunch of losers just sitting on unused oil–
but low-lying Ithaca is farthest out to sea,
towards the sunset, and the others are apart, towards the dawn and sun.
It is rough, but no one promised you a rose garden.”

Yes, there were many a song that left the lips of trollops concerning that wonderous land granted by Providence, espousing Liberty, and granting Hard Knocks.
To potential visitors, the chamber of commerce called gilding the lily what actual residents called polishing the turd. It was a stunning place to see and many who lived there couldn’t shake the stun from their faces.

There were many great monuments and gods and statues putting form to virtue but no greater figure existed than the living icon of the Great King, Majestic and Beardy.
He was a self-parodying simulacrum of ‘kingness’, a former Hollywood actor of chimp-hijinks cinema and baseball team owner. He was a modern cowboy and an anachronism in his own time. He stood as tall as a candy machine and dispensed Snickers when gut-punched.
He was King Ulysses S. Groan, man of little words and short sentences.
Born and raised within the 45 square miles of his home, he never intended to leave it.
And though he was a grand schemer, we all know about the best laid schemes of mice and men…
they’re gang aft a-gley.

 

December 29, 2009

Millions of Americans Hear of Yemen for First Time, Demand Its Destruction

Posted by Ryan McGivern under Comedy, Ethics, Love, news, Places, Violence
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Detroit–This week, Panty Raid bomber Umar Farouk Abdulmutallab breathed new life into a city long thought dead. The suspect enroute from the international house of pannekoeken, Amsterdam, sought to explode his “[genitals] so hot baby” but his attempt’s failure is being credited on his oversight to powder down his schwetty kibbles and bits.

The Nigerian Abdullmutallab’s stay in a strange and myterious land called “Yemen” has rankled the ire of Senator Joe Lieberman and millions of other droopy faced Americans.

“If I knew on what continent this supposed country was, assuming it is a real country and not a Narnia-eque playland of the imagination, I would bomb it myself.” Said Detroit’s Bethlehem Baptist Pastor Steve Utnam on Christmas Day.

Millions of Americans have been quizzically scouring over Google maps trying to locate the word ‘Yemen’ only to end up being distracted by smell of burning Pop Tarts from the other room. Google reports that searches for “Bomb the Forest Moon of Yemen”, “Tora Tora Tora Yemen”, “Blow Sum Shit Up Unquestioningly Yemen” quadrupled since the attempted Panty Raid.

Independent Senator from Connecticut Joe Lieberman said speaking with War Marketing Officials at Fox News, “Iraq was yesterday’s war, Afghanistan is today’s war. If we don’t act preemptively, Yemen will be tomorrow’s war…..The Iraq war is over. Boring. Been there, done that. Afghanistan is totally hot right now. Afghanistan is to heroin production and chaos what Amy Winehouse is to heroin comsumption and chaos. If we don’t wage an immediate illegal war with Yemen, we will have to wage a postponed illegal war against Yemen.”

“Any country remotely associated with a person who is black, Muslim, and tries something murderous, involving their panties or not, should be pre-emptively bombed, razed, and then occupied for a decade.” Said Tammy Sharms, a mother of eight from St. Louis, MO. “So long as that country is poor, under the control of warlords or despots, and has oil.” Mrs. Sharms was quick to point out “Saudia Arabia is not poor.”

America holds its breath to see whether America will ‘snikt’ its ferocious and berzerker military might on Iran or move on to the greener pastures of Yemen. Either way, Americans are hopeful that by next Christmas they will have more loved ones serving in some war somewhere.

Said Pastor Utnam, “Was Jesus born in Yemen? That sounds familiar.”

 

December 25, 2008

Warmer Times: July 4th photo dump

Posted by j.j. under Adventure, Nostalgia, Places, Travel
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It is snowing in Seattle and has been for a week.  Initially it was idyllic, brightening the gray Seattle winter.  But now it has turned to muddy ice and slush and going outside is a messy occupation.

Thus, let’s journey back to warmer sunnier memories, my trip with Courtney up the Washington Coast on July 4th.

We took a ferry and met some wind

We took a ferry from Anacortes and met some wind.

I look like one of those trolls.

My hair reminds me of those toy trolls.

Sometimes I close my eyes and I go here.

Sometimes I close my eyes and I go here.

I think this was Anacortes. This band has some groupies.

Inside Port Angeles. This band has groupies.

Some sort of Beauty Queen, perhaps sponsored by The Flying-O Truck Stop. Walking on the boardwalk on heals is an ambitious pursuit, and enteraining to walk behind.

Some sort of Beauty Queen, perhaps sponsored by The Flying-O Truck Stop. Those yellow shoes really ties the outfit together, don't ya think?

Walking behind

Walking on the boardwalk in heals is an ambitious pursuit and entertaining to walk behind.

This fellow was tempting fate. I think his name is Travis.

This fellow was tempting fate. I think his name is Travis.

Fools in love!!

Fools in love!!

Someone had fun illustrating the dangers of electricity.

Someone had fun illustrating the dangers of electricity.

If this were my mother, Id be a different person.

If this were my mother, I'd be a different person.

The man and baby on the right got style.

The man and baby on the right got style.

Then we went to some hot springs and met a naked hippy and some Minnesotans and this woman who just loved to hike. Oh, the sweet smell of sulfur!! It brings me home.

Then we went to some hot springs and met a naked hippy. a hot and heavy couple, some Minnesotans and this woman who just loved to hike. Oh, the sweet smell of sulfur!! It brings me home.

Here are the Minnesotans. They invited us to some Tex Mex!

Here are the Minnesotans. Beth and Liz invited us to some Tex Mex! Although in the photo it looks like Liz is grilling sticks.

You know, taking our own picture.

You know, taking our own picture, awkward style with one arm pointing the camera towards us with little or no accuracy.

Time for some wine on the beach! Biatch.

Time for some wine on the beach! Biatch.

Playing in the sand, in case you couldnt tell. We were making mazes for miniature sand crabs.

Playing in the sand, in case you couldn't tell. We were making mazes for miniature sand crabs.

A tasty finale!

A tasty finale!

 

February 20, 2008

Jesus Comes Back May 21st, 2011. Watch Him return from Frankenmuth Michigan!

Posted by Ryan McGivern under Activities, Adventure, Future, Justice, Magic, Places, Pop Culture, Religion, Science, Time, Travel
[2] Comments 

Are you one of those who goes to uneasy sleep each night wondering when Jesus is going to come back? Do you want to enjoy a whole expo of world beers as He floats down from heaven? Here’s all the info you’ll need to get ready for MAY 21st, 2011, the day Jesus’ll come back.

  • Matthew 24:37 “As were the days of Noah, so shall be the coming of the son of man.”
  • Genesis 7:4 “For yet seven days and I will cause it to reain upon the earth.”
  • II Peter 3:8 “Forget not this one thing, beloved, that one day is with the Lord as
    a thousand years.”
  • It is known the exact year of the flood in Noah’s day was the year 4990 BCE. Thus, seven days, 7000 years. Thus, if you add 7000 to Noah’s flood date, you get 2011. The extra year is accounted for in the ‘zero’ year between BCE and CE.
  • Hence, May 21st 2011 is the day Jesus is coming back.

For more information on Jesus, email davidto216@sbcglobal.net

I say let’s all plan on spending the day of infamy at the Frankenmuth World Expo of Beer, in Frankenmuth Michigan, taking place during May 20 and 21 2011.
http://www.frankenmuthfestivals.com/?subpage_id=2009
http://www.frankenmuth.org/
http://beer.about.com/od/beerfestivals/gr/FrankFest2007.htm

Frankenmuth Michigan: the only place to be when Jesus comes back.

Ryan McGivern
www.myspace.com/mckibbon

 

February 7, 2008

“Cool and hip are sooo last year…Tacky is the new black.”

Posted by j.j. under Blog, Nostalgia, Places
1 Comment 

dog cprAs you all know, mindflowers has a gargantuan following in the Greater Orlando/Kissimmee Metropolitan Area. Therefore to and fro, the mindflowers staff is proud as bacon bits to officially endorse the following blog — A Guide to All Things Tacky and Fabulous in Orlando. At the time of this writing, GATTFO is highlighting the chivalrous heroic integrity of a firefighter who saves the lives of dogs by performing CPR.

Important Update: Check out this entry about 100+ people who camped in tents overnight in a parking lot beside Chick-Fil-A hoping to win free food.

 

February 6, 2008

Imaginary Letter: What is Real?

Posted by j.j. under Improvised Writing, Letters, Love, Places, Romance
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From EmmaTo my Love -

I dreamed we were walking through the city. Your fingers digging into my side, counting my ribs absentmindedly as the sky scrapers loomed overhead. Sour-faced glass panes reflecting back our shifting, sloppy grasp. Is there a reason I fit so well here? Tucked under your shoulder, shielded from the disapproving grey glares of these steel structures. Is this love, or just a distraction? Is what we have real, or just a shadow of someone else’s love, like those bobbing, sterile reflections in a cold, empty city.

Please don’t wake me.

Emma

 

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